How to Get Attention (aka Introducing Your Story)

by Meredith Maslich

As I mentioned in my first column, one of the differences between performance storytelling and social storytelling, is that social storytelling doesn’t offer the same assumption of audience attention. So my colleague Joe Price and I came up with some strategies (and then named them, of course) for  creating an opening, or introducing your story in different social settings. Likely, not all of these will work all of the time, and they’re largely dependent on what type/how many stories you have at your fingertips (tongue tip?), but they’re  a good place to start.

The Compliment

Someone else has all the attention telling their own story, but you can shift the attention to yourself by offering a hearty compliment to the speaker. This works best when you have a story that directly relates to the one you’re complementing.

Example 1: “Wow – I can’t believe how quick thinking you were! I’m never that calm under pressure” and boom, launch into your story.

Example 2: “Oh my god, you’re so funny! That was a really great story.” This more general compliment gives you more leeway regarding how your story relates, although you don’t want it to be too big a leap, otherwise it becomes obvious you were offering the compliment to steal the floor. And that can get awkward… Or so I’ve heard…

The Ice Breaker

This method lets you be a little more direct about getting everyone’s attention so you can tell a story. This works best in small, somewhat awkward social gatherings where people don’t know each other well, like a baby shower where you all know the guest of honor but not really each other. If you’re standing around with a few people and no one’s talking you can say something like:  “I had the craziest thing happen the other day…”

This option also works great for first dates or those awkward morning-after breakfasts. I assume.

This also works great if you have a friend with you who can set you up with a, “Hey Jenny, tell that story about…” then all you have to do is tell your story.

Stop the Presses

This works best in social setting where you know most if not all of the guests fairly well, because it requires a little bit of a social disruption, possibly stealing the attention from someone else unceremoniously. This is the introduction you use when you have a great story – either it just happened and you can’t do anything until you get it out, or it’s especially shocking or hilarious or unique in some way. In this case you simply announce, using your words and body language that you’re bursting, a la:“OH MY GOD, you will NOT believe what that cab drive just said!” I personally find this one very useful, even though my friends and I disagree over what qualifies as a “Stop the Presses” story. I maintain that finding a quarter on the sidewalk qualifies.

Thread (Epic Storytelling)

This only works if you are with people who you know well, and you have an ongoing saga in your life that they know about. If that’s the setting, then you can just say, “Have I told you the latest stunt my ex pulled?” and as long as a majority say no, and/or encourage you to give them the update, then you’re good to go.

Do you have other methods to get people to listen to your stories in social settings? Have you ever used any of these methods, even if you didn’t know what to call it? Tell me in the comments. Because I personally use these a lot and could use some new ways to trick my friends introduce my stories. Just to keep it fresh.